<p>When The Paper Wolf was first created in 1999, the appropriately titled “Back Page” of the printed publication was always reserved for fun (and often ridiculous) non-news items that were created strictly for entertainment purposes, such as games, silly quotes, and tongue-in-cheek campus observations. Now that the The Paper Wolf has entered the digital realm while retaining the historical title that now appears to be a misnomer, the tradition of The Back Page must continue, as well, with tongue planted firmly in cheek. </p>
[satire] CRY WOLF: New Benilde Bathroom Already Smells Terrible
Cry Wolf Satirical News Note: The old Benilde Hall contained a restroom that was notorious for its horrible smell and general uncleanliness. (COVINGTON, La.) The bathroom of the newly renovated Benilde Hall already smells terrible, according to numerous disgusted sources. Students and faculty alike have expressed confusion as to how the brand-new bathroom, which came […]
[satire] CRY WOLF: Couple Who Is Bad at Saying ‘No’ Buy 17th Cutco Knife Set
Cry Wolf Satirical News. Note: Cutco is a high-end knife selling company known for hiring high school and college students to sell its products. The students are paid on commission and are often encouraged to try selling to friends and family. (MANDEVILLE, La.) A Northshore couple who are bad at saying “no” have just […]
[satire] CRY WOLF: St. Paul’s Student Joins Gang, Falls Into Life of Crime After Hair Gets Too Long
Cry Wolf Satirical News (COVINGTON, La.) St. Paul’s School is well-known for its haircut policy requiring any student whose hair grows past a certain length to cut it, as well as shave any facial hair they have, or face disciplinary action. A St. Paul’s student has reportedly joined a gang and fallen into a […]
Class of 2018 Senior Wills
As the 107th graduating class of St. Paul’s School begins commencement exercises in the Briggs Assembly Center on campus at 4 p.m. on Saturday, May 12, the graduates look back on the legacy that they leave at St. Paul’s. A long-standing tradition of The Paper Wolf, many of these seniors present their bequests to those […]
[satire] CRY WOLF: St. Paul’s Student Devastated to Realize There’s Still 50 Minutes Left of Class
Cry Wolf Satirical News (COVINGTON, La.) The four block, 90-minute class schedule St. Paul’s operates under has given students a very unique relationship with the clock. A St. Paul’s student was reportedly devastated to realize there was still 50 minutes left of class yesterday (May 9). Sources say sophomore Tyrone Peters was horrified after looking […]
[satire] CRY WOLF: Josh Rovira Under Investigation for Colluding with Jesuit during Student Council Election
Cry Wolf Satirical News. (COVINGTON, La.) An investigation has been opened into newly-elected St. Paul’s Student Council President Josh Rovira for colluding with the Jesuit High School Student Council during the recent 2018 St. Paul’s Student Council election. The investigation into Rovira and his campaign team was opened after it was discovered that the Jesuit […]
[satire] CRY WOLF: Teacher Trying to Actually Teach During Last Period on a Friday Clearly Delusional
Cry Wolf satirical news. (COVINGTON, La.) A teacher who was actually trying to teach her class during the last period of school on a Friday is clearly delusional, according to multiple concerned sources. Students say Janice Bell, a Geometry teacher, has “definitely gone off the deep end” after she attempted to run a productive class […]
CRY WOLF (satire): New Report Shows Fortnite Responsible for More St. Paul’s Student Brotherhood Than All Retreats Combined
(Cry Wolf Satirical News) Popular video game Fortnite: Battle Royale is responsible for creating stronger brotherhood among St. Paul’s students than all St. Paul’s retreats combined, according to a new report released yesterday by Louisiana State University. Fortnite: Battle Royale (often shortened to just Fortnite), is an online multiplayer game where 100 players are dropped onto […]
[satire] CRY WOLF: Dad in Crowd of High School Basketball Game Getting a Little Too Into it
Cry Wolf Satirical News. (COVINGTON, La.) A dad in the crowd of a high school basketball game is getting a little too into it, according to reports. “Travel! That’s a travel! Open your eyes, ref!” screamed local dad Mike Bower, who fellow spectators say is becoming a little too emotionally invested in this JV pre-season […]
