Class of 2017 Senior Wills

Seniors, it’s not too late to leave your bequests! Email your bequests along with your name, future college and intended major to thepaperwolf@stpauls.com.

I, William Paxton Murphy, bequeath my not 1 but 2 sisters and cattle to the honorable Hyde Healy, Austin Holincheck, and Cole Abide. I also bequeath my lack of soul to Grant Hughes and presidential powers to Paxton Ballard. (Southern Methodist University/Gender Studies)

I, Cameron Meyers, bequeath the toaster stroodle effect, started by Nick Harper, to Adam Moenich. I also bequeath Garrett Hick’s love of cake to Gavin Grefer. (LSU/Accounting and Finance)

I, Jordan Kliebert bequeath my NBA 2k skills to Deuce Monteiro. (LSU/Mass Communications)

I, Josh Murr, bequeath the ripper mod (my lax stick) to Reiss Plauche. (Oglethorpe University/Business)

I Eli Crosby, Beau Monteiro, Luke Broussard bequeath Farley to Deuce Monteiro. (undisclosed)

I, Brenton Larmann, bequeath my speedo to Tonner Dougherty and my Jew-Fro to Jesse Cheng.(University of Louisiana at Lafayette/Mechanical Engineering)

I, Cameron Byrne, bequeath the argument winners to Bradley Anzalone, my incredible senioritis to Connor Demarest, Squeakair to Jacob Coutrado and Rhyne Sepcich, the Tuba Snake to Cameron Holmes, and the Grandma Car to Mason Byrne. (Mississippi State University/Software Engineering)

I, Austin Scheyd, bequeath my horrible sense of humor to Brady Meibaum, my Biloxi room key to Christian Butler, and DAS BOOT to Caleb Frost. (LSU/Business Management)

I, Reagan Hill, bequeath officially the role of cast dad of the Marian Players to Isaac Hebert and the right to be called a Hill to Ryan “bump” Hill. (LSU/Kinesiology)

I, Ethan Hopel, bequeath my smart wit and smile to Christian Butler. (Spring Hill/Secondary Education)

I, Kiefer Napolitano, bequeath the pregame handshake to Gavin Gaude and pregame music to Luke Andrews. (LSU/Business)

I, Ryan Flood, bequeath my parking spot to Chris Flood, my magnificent hair to Christian Harrison, the shirt that Nick Sibley bequeathed to me in 2014 to Hyde Healy, and my dance moves to Colin Moser. Also, I would like to bequeath control of the lacrosse group message to Cole Abide. (Belmont Abbey/ Government and Political Philosophy)

I, Marc Costa, bequeath my Uber driving skills to Colin Quinlan, the song Temperature to Nico Walters, and my ability to do Math XL to Cole Abide. (LSU/Canadian Studies)

I, Alex Duet, bequeath the name Duet to Carter Duet. I also bequeath my Clash skills to Blaine Sullivan. (William Carey University/Biology)

I, Dylan Futrell, bequeath the sauce to Gabe Ingram and Corey Williamson, the hands line to Nick Picone, and Coach John Meibaum to Chris Flood and Cole Abide. (undisclosed)

I, Thomas Harris, bequeath my title as average hurdler to Thomas Bourgeois.(LSU/Pre-Veterinary Medicine)

I Liam Ordoyne bequeath my hula girl to Aidan Ordoyne, the number 10 lacrosse jersey to Paxton Ballard, and the rights to Anna Kate to Michael Phillipe. (LSU/Biology)

I, Christian Rabalais bequeath my parking spot to David McWilliams and my tallness to Ethan Plauche. (Missionary Year- La Tech/Civil Engineering)

I, Spencer Cole, bequeath my Katy Perry CD collection to Cameron “the ultra” Vidal. (Los Angeles Valley College/Study Marketing)

I, Bradley Mashburn, bequeath Grace’s sweet love to my brother Jack Mashburn. (University of Georgia/Business)

I, Nick Ashton, bequeath my hands to Mason Pausina, my ability to position my rack toms correctly to Michael Silvestri, my ability to carry tenors while also being the shortest person on the line to Max Anderson. (LSU/Mass Communications)

I, John Birdsong, bequeath my extensive list of neighborhood codes and crippling senioritis to Adam Moennich. (Peace Studies/Anonymous)

I, Oliver Sibley, bequeath my attraction to homeschool girls to Nick Picone, my spotify fluidity to William James, and my youthful ears and James Bay appreciation to Victor Morlas. (Focusing on self discovery with LSU’s Connor Slimming but attending Franciscan University of Steubenville)

I, Quinn Arnold, bequeath my distinct lack of social skills to Ethan Yawn. (University of Louisiana at Lafayette/Electrical Engineering)

I, Christian Roberts bequeath my football shorts to Jack Bonaldi and parking spot to Cameron Vidal. (Millsaps/Business)

I, Jonathan Rushing, bequeath my ferns to Nick Vining and my squat to Nick Picone. (LSU/Polyamorous Necrophilia)

I, Kyle Hladky, bequeath my mountain of Saint Paul’s papers and my speedo to Jesse Cheng. (Boston College/Undecided)

I, William Heurtin, bequeath my d-1 ability and snapchats to Jacob Scherer and my paint brushes to Kyle Conigliaro. (Rhodes/Baseball)

I, Zack Gallagher, bequeath my parking spot to Zach Bodenheimer and the nickname “thickness” to Corey Williamson. (undisclosed)

I, Nico Arcuri, bequeath the bar I set in the theatre to Luke Vargas, so that he may raise it. (LSU/Theatre)

I, Josh Tourelle, bequeath my pong skills to Cameron Vidal and Gabe Ingram; and my looks to Michael Doherty. (Southeastern University/Business)

I, Chris Weintritt, bequeath to, Rhett Ibos, the ability to only go to one track practice a week but still be on varsity because no one else does your event. (LSU/Biological Engineering)

I, Ruston Keller, bequeath the band buss song to Andy Anderson. (Spring Hill/Biology)

I, Jack Fleming, bequeath my name to Charles Hoy. (undisclosed)

I, Alex Oliveri, bequeath my parking spot on the side of the tennis courts to whoever keeps stealing it every time I’m running five minutes late. (Ole Miss/Business/Pre-Med)

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